Dear Douchnozzle:

You stole my bike seat.


I hope you are blessed with the fiery wrath of hemorrhoids.




2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Laura Jane
    Aug 27, 2010 @ 09:47:21

    Maybe someone just REALLY needed a bike seat because they were trying to chase down a masked criminal who robbed a person who was collecting charity money outside a grocery store and your bike seat happened to be nearby so they grabbed it, clubbed the criminal to a bloody and deserved end and covered in the bike seat in blood rendering it unreturnable. But just think about all the children in Africa you saved because you let someone borrow your bike seat to club a theif and return the donations to the unsuspecting charity worker!!


  2. cheekypinky
    Aug 27, 2010 @ 11:18:07

    oh, lauranstein!

    i never thought of that!

    next time,
    i will leave the key for my kryptonite lock next to the bike,
    so they can use the whole thing as a unit of mass defense.

    but only because of the children in africa.


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